September 28, 2007

Trailers: Trade

Kevin Kline, a drama about Mexican kidnapping.

From the looks of the trailer, it looks like they didn’t even need Kevin Kline for this. Does anybody remember Dave? That was a good movie. They needed Kevin Kline in Dave.

Trailers: Midnight Meat Train

Bradley Cooper, Vinnie Jones, Leslie Bibb, Brooke Shields, a horror film.

So the cops know where the killer does his killing, when he does his killing, and the type of person he kills, but he just keeps slipping through their fingers. This is stupid. And Brooke Shields is in it. So it’s stupid.

September 27, 2007

Trailers: Lake Of Fire

From the director of American History X, a documentary on abortion.

Too soon for aborted baby jokes?


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Trailers: Before the Devil Knows You’re Dead

Philip Seymour Hoffman, Ethan Hawke, Albert Finney, Marisa Tomei, a crime drama.

Two brothers rob their own parent’s jewelry store and their dad shoots their best friend and Philip Seymour Hoffman cries. I wonder whose up for the Oscar.

September 26, 2007

Trailers: Feel The Noise

From producer Jennifer Lopez, Omarion, some other people, a dancing movie.

After viewing this trailer, the only thing I kept wondering was why people were shocked that somebody tried to shoot the guy from the band B2K.

Trailers: 30 Days of Night

From producer Sam Raimi, Josh Hartnett, Melissa George, Ben Foster, a thriller.

If you ever thought about moving to Alaska, this is a documentary on that month when the sun doesn’t go up and everybody’s all depressed and acting like vampires and stuff.

Trailers: Bee Movie

The latest trailer from the anticipated kid’s movie, with the voices of Jerry Seinfeld, Renee Zellweger, Matthew Broderick, John Goodman, Chris Rock, and others.

The Seinfeld curse is really true.

September 25, 2007

Trailers: The Good Night

Penelope Cruz, Martin Freeman, Gwyneth Paltrow, Simon Pegg, Danny Devito, a comedy romance.

Only in movies can somebody be discontent married to Gwyneth Paltrow, and their consolation prize is Penelope Cruz. He’s probably gay.

Trailers: Aliens Vs. Predator: Requiem

Aliens, Predator, another one of those movies.

It could be said that Hollywood was running the Alien and Predator franchises into the ground, but that would mean that they actually weren’t there in the first place.

Trailers: Kurt Cobain About A Son

A documentary on Kurt Cobain.

So somebody got 25 hours worth of audio interviews from a music journalist. Instead of A: just releasing the tapes, or B: releasing a film having to do with the tapes; they make a movie of compiled clips over random esoteric shots that have nothing to do with Kurt Cobain or what he’s talking about. You’ve gotta hand it to the film industry, they’re always thinking up new crappy ideas.



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